I’ve touched on this subject little in a previous post called “My Thoughts on Feminism”, but after listening to JJ Virgin speak with Sean Croxton on one of his podcasts (which I highly recommend) it got me thinking again about women and myself and what pressures and expectations we perceive to be.
I also wrote a post called “Your Power, Your Control, Your Responsibility”. The intersections of what I wrote in these two posts and the pressure and expectations we perceive is where I believe the magic can happen.
I think that a lot of women if not most women or all women perceive pressure and expectations are put upon us….from society, parents, spouses, children, bosses, ourselves….etc. There is pressure to do it all and do it all well.
BUT, the beauty is we don’t have to! Let me say that again….we (YOU) don’t HAVE to!
In my opinion, this concept is real feminism.
YOU ARE NOT WORTH LESS because you can’t or don’t want to do it all and do it all well! YOU ARE NOT WORTH LESS because you don’t want to conform to others expectations nor succumb to outside pressures.
You DO NOT have to do it all and do it all well!
You do what you can do the best you can do it and the rest will be there tomorrow. Ask for help where you need it to get things accomplished. The unrealistic expectation of doing it all yourself it not only ridiculous but is tearing women down….physically, mentally, and emotionally.
It is your choice to accept the pressure and expectations of other people outside of yourself. It is your choice to set your own expectations, your own rules, your own thoughts and feelings. You do not have to accept what others want to impose on you. If you do, that is your choice too.
BUT, if you don’t like what others want you to do, want you to be, want you to say, want you to look like…..then you can choose to politely decline and then go do, be, say, and look whatever and however you choose and want. (caveat: provided none of it causes harm to anyone else around you)
Side thought: You also do not have to explain yourself to anyone you don’t want to. You can simply say no. You have the right to say no; do not feel guilty about that.
Stop giving your power away. Take control of yourself. Be you. Be happy being you.
While I’ve made tremendous strides in the right direction, I still struggle with all this on the regular. I tell myself exactly what I’m telling you, which turns it around for me. Then I move forward one day at a time, one mistake at a time, one thought at a time. It is in my control. It is in my power. It is my responsibility. It is my choice. To be me. To be happy being me. To live my life how I chose to live my life. Not doing it all!
Here are a few short videos clips by Girls Gone Strong that are so great!
- Kelly Coffey – Part 1 The Manifestation of Shame and Blame
- Kelly Coffey – Part 2 The Manifestation of Shame and Blame
- Neghar Fonooni – Rewrite Your Reality
I pray that each woman reading this post receives this message to change their perspective and take action to elevate any pressure or expectations that they don’t want.